Misgivings
by Gillian Leigh
Summary: Fluff alert! Scully's leaving, and Mulder can't understand why.


**Title**: Misgivings  
**Author**: Gillian Leigh  
**Summary**: Another piece of Mulder/Scully fluff for your enjoyment. Scully's leaving and Mulder can't quite understand why. Minimal angst, maximum MSR.  
**Feedback**: Will be treasured forever and ever! 

**Author's Notes**: Meaningless, sugary sweet fluff. It's one of my crappier pieces, but I was in a super shippy mood. Take it or leave it.

Mulder strolled into his office at 7:30 that morning to find that Scully was already in. Not only that, but she was packing all of her personal effects in a cardboard box. He nearly dropped his coffee.

"Scully?" He said her name with fear and question in his voice. She abruptly spun around, and her face dropped at the sight of him standing in the doorway.

"Mulder..." she said.

"Did I miss something?" he asked, wanting to joke, but finding that he was far too scared to do so. Scully noted that there was no humor in his question, and felt her heart hammering in her chest as she spoke.

"I had hoped I'd get out of here before you came in. It would've been so much easier to tell you over the phone..." She set her name plate in the box.

"Tell me what?" he asked, stepping closer to her and setting his coffee on the desk. Scully found that she couldn't meet his eyes. She felt as if she was betraying him. They'd been through so much together in the past couple of months, and here she was, abandoning him.

"I'm leaving, Mulder." He felt his face drop.

"Leaving what? The FBI? Georgetown? The planet?" Scully felt a smile tug at the corners of her lips as he said the last one. She finally looked up at him, but rather than meeting his gaze, she kept her eyes on his mouth.

"Not the planet, but the FBI, and Georgetown," she said, quietly. Mulder was deeply affected by this. He thought they'd gotten much closer in the past few months, and now she was leaving, without so much as a reason.

"Why?" he found himself asking, before thinking about how harsh it sounded. Scully looked hurt as she finally met his gaze.

"Everything that's happened lately has made me realize that the FBI isn't really where I belong anymore, Mulder. I'm moving to Annapolis to practice. I've already got a job at the Annapolis General Hospital," she said, quietly.

"Oh," Mulder said, curtly. Scully looked down at her feet, before turning back to his desk. She picked up her box, and tucked it under her arm, moving toward the door. Mulder simply stepped aside and let her walk past him. He didn't even bother to turn and look at her before closing the door. If he had, he might've seen her mouth,

"I'm sorry. I love you, Mulder."

-X-

It was hard to believe that it'd been four months since Scully moved. Mulder was having a hard time adjusting, and every day he would consider his position in the FBI. Every day he added to his letter of resignation. A phrase here, a sentence there, a word or two. Every day he added another pencil to the ceiling.

The cases weren't the same without Scully. He'd been assigned seven partners in the four month span (a record for any department in the history of the Bureau) and they'd all either quit the Bureau entirely, or requested transfers. They said he drove them crazy; he drove them all away. It was during this time that Mulder grew more and more depressed, and found that his every waking thought was of Scully.

Finally, on the 122nd day of Scully's absence, Mulder added the last sentence to his letter of resignation. As he stared at the screen, which now showed the complete document, he found himself deep in thought. The FBI was what he had left. His family was gone, and he'd lost Scully because he'd driven her away. Mulder saved his letter of resignation, and turned off his computer before getting out of his chair. If he was quitting the FBI, he was at least going to get Scully back.

-X-

As he stepped out of the elevator onto the fifth floor of the hospital, Mulder felt his heart pounding in his chest. He'd talked to the receptionist on the first floor, who told him Scully's floor; now it was just a matter of wandering around until he found her. It didn't take him long. At the end of the hallway in front of him, Scully stood, with her back to him, talking to a group of people dressed in street clothes, presumably the family of a patient. He approached them, and clearly heard her say,

"...but I can assure you that James is going to be just fine. He can go home in a few days, and you can see him now." The man and woman, the child's parents, looked relieved, as did the young boy with them. She turned to the boy, and said,

"And no more tackle football for a while, okay?" The little boy nodded, and the parents thanked Scully and shook her hand before turning away and stepping into the hospital room directly behind them. Mulder smiled as he said,

"Excuse me, Dr. Scully." She turned around.

"Yes?....Oh my God, Mulder!" she exclaimed. She was shocked, but he was too. There was a distinctive bulge around Scully's middle. She was...pregnant. At that moment, Mulder could've cried in despair. This baby, whoever Scully was having it with, meant that he couldn't have his Scully back. Not when she was having someone else's child.

Looking into his face, Scully saw all the light go out in his eyes. Immediately her mind began working overtime so she could attempt to explain to Mulder.

"Mulder, I...." she paused, laying a hand on his arm. "I'm pregnant." She saw a flicker of a smile, and could've slapped herself. Way to state the obvious.

"Congratulations, Scully," he said. She gently rested her hand on her belly. She could see, however, that he looked positively crestfallen. Mulder's mood worsened when a man in scrubs, presumably a nurse or a lab tech, approached Scully and gave her a hug and kiss on the cheek.

"Hey Danes. How're you feeling?"

"Fine, Mike." She noticed it was awkward to have Mulder just standing there. "Uh, Mike, this is Fox Mulder, he was my partner when I worked in the FBI. Mulder, this is Mike Robinson, he works here." Mike extended his hand to Mulder, who looked less than impressed as he shook it.

"Nice to meet you," he said, kindly.

"Ditto," Mulder added coldly.

"Dinner tonight at seven, right?" Mike asked Scully, clearly not seeing the Death Look in Mulder's eyes.

"Yep," Scully said, trying not to see the looks Mulder was giving Mike.

"Okay," Mike replied, and walked away, giving them both a wave as his beeper began going off. Scully turned back to Mulder.

"Mulder...." she began, seeing the look in his eyes. "Mike is just..."

"A friend. I know Scully. They're all just 'friends'," he said, coldly. "I have to go. Goodbye Scully, and best of luck." Mulder began walking away, and ignored Scully as she started off after him, calling his name. She stopped as the elevator doors closed behind Mulder, and sighed fighting back tears. Her hand came to rest, once again, on her five months pregnant belly, and she said,

"Little one, your daddy's awfully mad at me; I don't know how I'm going to fix this one."

"Talking to that baby again, Dana? You know it can't hear you yet," Mike said with a laugh, startling her. When she looked at him, he saw she was crying; he hugged her and said,

"Oh sweetie, what is it?" She sniffled into his chest and said,

"It's Mulder."

"Did he upset you, doll face? Cause if he did, I'll take care of him for you," Mike said, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. Scully couldn't help but laugh.

"Sorry, Mike, I'm afraid Mulder is very, very straight." He looked positively disappointed.

"Damn. So tell me, what's happened that's got you so upset and Mr. Foxy Fox Mulder running off?" He walked her to the cafeteria and got her a brownie.

"Ah, you know the way to a pregnant woman's heart," she said, after taking a bite. Mike smiled at her over the rim of his coffee mug. She took a deep breath before beginning.

"About nine months ago, I went to a fertility specialist, who told me that I could be impregnated through in-vitro fertilization; an avenue which I hadn't explored before then. I hadn't considered it. I mean, I was effectively barren before then," she said, taking time to chew and swallow another bite of brownie. "But I needed a donor. The doctor told me I could go to Genetic Counseling and get an anonymous donor, unless I had someone in mind. I did, I just didn't know how to ask him."

"Mulder?" Mike asked. Scully nodded. "What did he say?"

"He said yes," she said quietly, almost crying at the memory. "But the first in-vitro failed. I was devastated, but he was there for me. I could tell that it hurt him almost as badly. But good did come out of it. After that, our relationship changed. We went on dates; we snuck kisses in the office, and steamed up the windows of several rental cars during stake-outs. During all of that, the doctor informed me that we could give the in-vitro another go; they had enough of Mulder's 'donor materials' left to try it again. But I couldn't bring myself to tell Mulder that I was having it done. It would be hard enough knowing it didn't work, but I didn't want to see Mulder hurt again either. I was ecstatic when the doctor told me it worked. But I didn't know how to tell Mulder. We'd never talked about what would happen if the IVF worked. I lost my nerve and got this crazy idea that it would be best if he didn't know. So I came here. Now all he knows is that I'm pregnant, and he's assuming that it's anyone's but his. I've really messed things up," Scully concluded, wiping away a tear. Mike put his hand on top of hers and said,

"I'll understand if you're not there for our dinner date tonight." She smiled compassionately at him and said,

"Thanks so much, Mike."

-X-

Mulder nearly fell off his couch when he heard a knock at his door at seven that evening. He sat up and walked over to answer it. He glanced through the peephole and got a shock when he saw Scully standing there. He opened the door and let her in.

"Hi, Mulder," she said.

"Hi," he responded. "Let me take your coat." He helped her remove it, and hung it on the coat rack. An awkward silence ensued.

"Mulder...we need to talk."

"I know we do, Scully. Sit down, please. You shouldn't be on your feet as much as you are; I don't have to be around you every day to know that," Mulder said. She gratefully sank into the couch. She took his hand in hers before saying,

"Mike is just a friend, Mulder, really. He could never be more than that because, well, he's gay." His eyebrows went up, and Scully briefly nodded before continuing. "I'm five and a half, almost six months pregnant." Mulder contemplated for a moment and then said,

"Congratulations, Scully."

"What I'm trying to say is…the baby's yours."

"What?!"

"I had a second in-vitro done, and it worked," she said, smiling slightly.

"Scully, this is...amazing. Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, taking her other hand in his. She sighed, and squeezed his hands.

"I don't know. I was scared. We'd never talked about what would happen if the in-vitro worked. I thought it would scare you off. I mean, I'd never asked you to be anything other than a father in the genetic sense, and I thought you might think I wanted you to be more. I just...didn't know if you wanted that," she said, unable to meet his eyes.

"Scully, look at me," Mulder commanded gently, searching for her eyes. She looked up at him. "I don't know if I've ever told you this, but I love you more than life itself. I want nothing more than to have a child with you, and to be with you." And with that proclamation, Scully began to cry. Mulder leaned in and kissed her, and was relieved to be met with no resistance. When his hand came to rest on her belly, and began to gently caress it, Scully cried harder, and Mulder smiled into her mouth as he pulled her in closer to him.

When they finally pulled apart, they remained close together, with their foreheads touching. Mulder wiped away some of Scully's tears, and smiled at her.

"I love you too, Mulder."

-X-

Mulder opened his eyes, and smiled at the sleeping woman who was curled up in his lap, with her hand resting on her belly. He smiled and placed his hand there too, feeling another fluttering movement from their child. He reached behind him, into the drawer of the end table, and pulled out the square, velvet box. Blowing the fine layer of dust off the top, Mulder remembered the lines he'd rehearsed for such a long time, all those months before Scully left. Smiling to himself he put the box back in the drawer, and closed his eyes. Mulder knew he'd sleep well for the first time in months that night, and fell back to sleep with the woman he loved in his arms.

And that is the way it should be.  
-la fin-

Author's Notes: Ack. This one's so sweet it makes me gag. But I haven't posted a darn thing in a while, so I figured it would be best to put _something_ up.


End file.
